Thursday, October 28, 2010

Dirty Jobs

You've seen the show...gross jobs that someone has to do, right? Well, I think they should add potty training to that list of "Dirty Jobs". I HATE potty training. Well, it's not that bad at home really, it's in public that I hate potty training the most.

Public restrooms are no fun regardless...especially with kids. First you rush in at the moment your child says, "Mommy potty". Oh crap! Where the heck is the bathroom in this place...The front? The back? Oh I'm hurrying honey. You beg and plead with your wee one who is literally holding himself and at this point yelling "Pee Mommy Pee Mommy...and POOP".

Oh great! Running faster to the restroom which of course is opposite from wherever you are in the store...and of course add a few extra children to the mix and remind them to keep up...don't we can't get that....hurry...come on!

Finally you arrive at the bathroom, praying there is no line, and run into a stall. Only this stall has pee all over the seat and you scream "Wait eww no don't touch". Next one, lock the door, proceed to take off all clothes b/c said child will not aim if his pants are on. Finally success and laughing "Haha Mommy, poop splash, ahahahha". Glad the whole bathroom knows he's pooping. And eww gross public toilet water splashing my cute little man's hiney. Bath time for sure tonight!

Then you need to go. So you dress your child and remind him to "stand over there" and "don't touch". Plead to stop unlocking the door. Now you have your foot propped up holding the door closed while child is screaming to "Move your foot Mommy!". You whisper, "Please leave the door locked, don't touch, can you put your hands in your pockets? Leave that alone. Hold on honey". And you tell the others who have finished to please stand outside your door. "Don't move I need to see your feet."

It's a chore really. By the time you're done your stress level is through the roof and you're trying to keep it together and be cheerful and proud of your child.

But ugh all I want to do it take a bath and bathe cuteness in a great heap of bubbles!

And who knows what went on in the other children's stall. Imagining the worst you scrub them all up with lots of soap and give them hand sanitizer after you get out.

No more drinks on this trip...please please please hold it until we get home.

I will admit I am a bit of a germ-a-phobe...I think God gets a good laugh everyday at the fact that he blessed me with 4 boys after 1 girl...boys are dirty and stinky and gross! Thank goodness they are super cute and so cuddly after a nice bath. Other wise this potty training thing might just throw me over the edge.

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