Wednesday, November 18, 2009

All right confession time...

I am in a crazy depression of a week. Weight loss is none...I have probably gained back everything I lost last week but I refuse to get on the scale b/c I'm so disappointed in myself. I have managed to take a Zumba class and have gone on several walks...but no weight training this week and no 30 Day Shred.

My eating is...well...horrible. After my fabulous dinner out Saturday for my birthday I have been on a horrible carb (not healthy ones) craving binge. Anything fast food sounds so delicious! I am proud I have still not had any Diet Coke...but I'm sure that doesn't make up for the fries and burger I had last night. I have been throwing in lots of vegetables and Green Monsters. But I have also had a lot of "JUNK".

I have got to break this cycle of losing all week and then gaining on the weekend. It is so hard to break. I can find on excuse after another for why this is...but when will enough be enough and I stop doing this to myself?

The cold weather and the rain have not helped my mood one bit! I am really hating being stuck in the house all day w/ 8 kids and some days I think I'm really going to lose my mind. Winter scares me! I really don't like being couped up inside w/ no adult contact and crying active children.

These things really make me start thinking about what I really want. Some days I think going back to work would be a better choice for our family because getting out of the house and being with adults might just help my moods. But then I think of all the moments I will miss with my Monkey. He will only be this little for so much longer. I really do like being my own boss. I do as I please during the day, but the daycare kids are here for 10 hours with no way to get out for a few minutes. If I go back to teaching my hours will be a little better and there will be some sort of adult contact through out the day. However, then I am under a different amount of stress and pressure. I just don't know what to do.

The kids and I leave for the beach in 2 1/2 days. Ia m really hoping this time away will help me clear my head and really figure out what to do. I want to be happy! I want to lose the weight, be happy in my career, and be a better wife and mother. Somehow I need to figure all this out...and fast before heavy medication is required.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated!

Sunday, November 15, 2009

This cute boy...

...Took me on my birthday date this weekend. I think it's been years since we went to the movies and dinner in the same night all by ourselves. WOW! And the kids all spent the night out we even slept peacefully with no interruptions during the night. No one to tell us they had to go to the bathroom or had a bad dream. And no baby screaming at 3:00 A.M. because his diaper was wet or his teeth hurt. No one needing a 4:00 A.M breathing treatment...It's been years too that I could sleep and not worry at every noise.
But it was bitter sweet at the same time. I really missed tucking them in, reading bedtime stories, and rubbing backs. And breakfast wasn't much fun all by myself as this cute boy could sleep all day. My body's alarm clock woke me up at 5:00...I managed to go back to sleep until 7:00 at least.

Then the phone rang....and my 4 year old was running a temp. of 103.8. Oh crap...wake up back to reality. I finished my coffee and headed out the door as fast as I could. I gave him Motrin as soon as I got him and within an hour it was down to 100. He played lots of Wii today and then took a 5 hour nap...and woke up as happy as could be. The fever never appeared again. Hmmm I'm really hoping it stays that way and maybe we can sleep again tonight.

Anyway, a night out w/o kids just my hot husband and that was so nice. Best birthday gift ever!

Friday, November 13, 2009

Screaming Abs!

Hello abs I forgot were there...stop screaming already! Oh how nice it is though to be reminded that they are under there. What an awesome week!

Morning weigh in revealed 3 pounds down....wooo hooo!

Highs for the week - I made it to Zumba 3 times, 2 run/walks, and 3 days of 30 Day Shred. Today I pushed myself to do level 2 and that's is when the abs decided to give it a scream along with my thighs...holy moly.

Lows for the week - I'm still craving Cheeseburger Bobby's. Have been for three days now. I'm super proud that I haven't given in, but the weekend is here and I am scared I'm going to undo all of this week's hard work. And I mean hard work!

On a positive note - It's my birthday weekend and hubby and I are actually going on a date. I'm really excited to have some much needed alone time w/ him, but again scared at undoing all of this week's hard work. Did I mention how hard this week was?

I made another Green Monster this morning...even better than the first. This time I added chocolate protein, spinach, skim milk, organic strawberries and a few vegan dark choc. chips. I'm going to get some more almond milk, energy powders, and see what else I can find interest in this weekend at Trader Joe's.

So here's looking at you week...and ready to start the weekend. Wish me luck!

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Oh how I love a challenge!

I'm super excited about a 30 Day Ab Challenge that OhSheGlows is sponsoring. I am going to take before, middle, and after pictures and having to send them to someone and report my measurements is sure to get me moving.

This morning I made my first Green Monster - I added 3 cups spinach, 1 cup skim milk, tbls. organic peanut butter, banana, a scoop of vanilla protein powder, and ice...I surely thought I was crazy that I was about to consume this green concoction. But oh my it was deliciouso! (

This week is going awesome so far...I've done Zumba 3 times, 2 sessions of 30 Day Shred, and last night I did the elliptical for 10 min increments and weight machines in between for a total of 40 min. on the elliptical and 25 minutes of weights.

Tonight I was thinking of heading to a boot camp class...but I've pulled a muscle in my neck and it's difficult turning my head. So I may have to opt for some walking during soccer practice. But nothing will stop me....something will be done today and I'm going to give all these plank exercises a try.

As far as food goes - This morning was scrambled eggs w/ spinach and Canadian Bacon along w/ my Green Monster for snack.
And I'm already excited about lunch...shrimp, sauteed peppers and onions, squash and zucchini. Yum!

Who knew eating healthy could taste so good! Right now I don't even miss all the processed food. Oh and it's been a week of no Diet Coke! Groovy!

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Phew...please let this be it for a minute...

Holy Macaroni - For the last two weeks we have had some crazy sick germs invading our home. It started w/ a fever virus that lasted up to 6 days and hit 3 kiddos. No other symptoms...just high fever. Of course I figured it was H1N1, but they all tested negative. Then we moved on to a little bronchitis in 2 little boys, I got a sinus infection and in the same night came down with a stomach virus which then spread to 3 of the kiddos. And just when I thought my hands we going to fall off from so much Lysol and Cloroxing....the dreaded H1N1 actually hit!

So, needless to say, not much exercising was going on except perfecting my cleaning skills. Which I figured was alright because I wasn't eating much and what I did eat was coming back out. But then I decided it would be okay to eat a little fast food here, or a brownie there, or try a "fun snack size" candy from the kids Halloween bags...bad bad bad! It started me back on my cravings. I mean I can't believe I can get it all out of my system, not even crave a Diet Coke, and with one bite it all changes back.

The good news is I am back on my workout schedule - Zumba 3 days a week, Jillian Michaels The Shred 3 days a week, walking as much as I can, and I'm trying really hard to get Yoga in at least 20 min. a day. It sounds like a lot, but these sessions are very much needed and they really do make me a happier wife and mommy. I don't get much time to myself at all, so as soon as my work day is done and dinner is cooked I'm off to the gym or out for a walk. Mommy's need time too (I keep telling myself this when I am caught up in the homework, whining, and blah blah blah of daily life). The kids don't always want to go to the Y and I'd never get a workout in if they all walked with I have been bringing the two little boys and the "big" kids usually stay with dad or big sister.

Now that baseball and soccer are finished for the season it's time to step my workouts up. My favorite instructor at the Y only teaches Zumba and Yoga during the day when I can't get there...but I just found out she is teaching a night time Boot Camp so I am going to try to get that in one day a week. The other instructors are good and keep me going, but this one in particular really kicks my butt. I keep telling my husband if I didn't have to have a job during the day I'd be one skinny wife because I would take all of her classes she that awesome.

Anyway, stepping it up and hoping the germs stay away for a while.