Wednesday, September 30, 2009

It all sounded good on paper...

Lately I have seen many MASH/MATH papers laying around, crumpled in book bags, folded in pockets...you know the ones that told us our "life story" when we were young. It has brought up many memories of which boys I was going to marry (yes I said boys w/ an S...there was always about 3-5 I had a huge crush on...who knew I would actually marry and divorce and marry again), where we were going to live, how many kids we would have, what I would be etc. etc.

Funny thing is it all looked so good on paper...You'll marry (...of course it was always the same 3-5 that I put down and now I don't even know them at all)...you'll have 3 babies, live in California, be a lawyer. If I had only known.

Never in my wildest dreams did I think I'd have 5 children and continue to want more. I always thought 3 was a good number. California? No way not even in my dreams...well maybe if we could live on the ocean, but I prefer the East Coast. A lawyer...well I have settled many debates/disputes around here so maybe sorta kinda...And thinking back to those boys...I have 4 boys and they are gross, dirty, do weird things that are unimaginable to people w/o children...surely "those" boys of the past were doing those weird things too, not taking showers when their mothers told them too, picking their noses when no one was looking, making fart noises...oh wait they did that in class anyway and everyone thought they were hilarious. Why did I have huge crushes on them?

And living in a "shack". Thank goodness that part never came true. Nor will a "mansion" but we live modestly and I don't mind it at all. I'm pretty much a simple kind of girl and I like it that way. Thank goodness my husband does too...well I'm sure he'd like to see me "dress-up" a little more than my jeans and t-shirts but we'll save that for another post.

The things those papers never told us was that the boy you would marry had a say so in your life too. WHAT? I had my kids names picked out for years. I'd doodle their names on paper in my notebooks, decorated their rooms, designed my house, etc. etc. Needless to say neither of my husbands liked the names I'd doodled for years and each had a say so in what our children were eventually named. It actually brought up much debating and arguing. And our house...looks nothing like I'd drawn for years and decorated. Of course those papers never told us how much money we'd make or how much the kids, house, husband would cost.

And thank goodness those papers never told us what you would go through to get that husband, child, house b/c I don't know that we would have even been interested after all that. Especially the affects of the babies and the body afterward. Yeah I never read that on any MASH paper. Thankfully we can recover and move on from a divorce or marriage issue but going through it seems like the world might actually end. Nope not on any of those MASH papers.

And I for one am thankful I didn't know what life would truly bring because now I can appreciate being pregnant with each child, giving birth (yeah that would have totally turned me off when I was a child) and even the struggles of marriage knowing what it has brought us today. Raising a 13 year old and 1 year old and all the in between at the same time is something quite exciting. And living with a man (which I never experienced w/ no dad and being an only child) is something exciting in itself. I learn something new everyday whether good or bad I'm glad I didn't know beforehand.

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