Thursday, August 6, 2009

Tough Decisions

Now that these sweet kids have started back to school I find myself wishing I could go off to work too. Get out of the house, dress up a little, feel like a real woman instead of a blah mommy in her sweats covered in smashed food and snot. Maybe even talk to real adults about real things going on in the world not just who The Wonder Pets had to save today or why jumping on the couch could lead to a head concussion or why that particular crayon drawing on the wall might not match the rest of the decor. I'd love to go to lunch and eat something like Thai food and discuss the newest whatever instead of grilled cheese and tomato soup and saying "please sit in your chair...and stop feeding the dog".

And once upon a time I had cute trendy clothes like this little princess. Of course not when I was her age b/c dressing like a boy was more my style. Looking back it's no wonder that cute boy I lusted over didn't pay much attention to me...I dressed just like him. Anyway, somewhere along the way I decided that putting a little more into myself wasn't so bad. I used to go to work and people told me I looked nice. My husband especially would make very nice comments about how I looked. Now those clothes hang in that back of the closet probably wondering if I can even get my body into them. I'm lucky if I even shower by noon...and of course it's never alone so sometimes only one leg gets shaved before I'm jumping out trying to keep the baby out of the toilet. Ahh what it must be like to shower alone or even pee in peace.

But then after all that day dreaming I think of all that I would miss. This adorable face would be awfully hard to drop off at daycare (especially since I can't find one that I have felt would give my kids the kind of attention that I would).

And teaching this little man all of his beginning educational needs. His art skills, letters, colors, etc. etc.

Or making butterscotch krispies in the middle of the day just because I want to. And my little man would be lacking all of his baking skills and getting to be the taste tester.

And the dancing...oh how we love to sing and dance all over the house.

And I'd miss the excitement of building "forts" and hiding in them. The reading time, searching for bears with flashlights, building block towers for Diego and his friends would all have to hold off for when we have the time.

I would have to fit these little moments in on the weekend along with the laundry, paying bills, scrubbing floors and toilets, grocery shopping etc. etc.

So for now I'll enjoy my comfy clothes and baby spit up. Someday when they're grown and have their own interests maybe then I'll figure out a career and head off to work. My time for now is here enjoying another cup of coffee and singing one more round of The Wheels on the Bus.


  1. You're not alone! I feel the same way. I wish I had a little money to get a few ideas started, then maybe I could make a little money on the side. I'm thinking about selling one of my legs. I could hobble around after the kids a lot better than missing an arm! LOL

  2. Oh I could get rid of the unshaved one since I won't get time to complete the task:)