After two weeks of changing pills for this reason I have finally figured out I am a little off. Okay a lot off. I'm moodier, one minute I'm down, the next I'm buzzing around getting things done, and then I crash and I'm super tired. I have had a few bad headaches this week and felt a little nauseous at night and first thing in the morning. And today I think I even said "Hello Danielle are you even in there anymore". I'm secretly hoping I've run off to this glorious island where there are no worries...just relaxing...on the sand in the sun...sipping something fruitybut since I'm sure I haven't been granted this one wish by some mysterious genie in a bottle I am here feeling a little bit like a teenager with all these hormones driving me bonkers. The only difference is I have realized my problem and am learning to control my sharp tongue and temper...well for the most part after I've already shot off at my husband or kids once or twice...my patience has been not so much this week.
Between feeling a little wacky and this precious Crazy Girlwho really is a teenager I am wondering where I went and what happened to me. Crazy Girl (who I think I have only referred to as Princess on here, but she is no longer this precious Princess...hormones have taken over her body and she is a true full blown teenage Crazy Girl)has been really mean to me lately. She thinks it makes her "cool" or something to make fun of me. Every time I open my mouth she seems to have something snide to say. If my voice cracks, or a little of my southern accent comes out, or if I use the wrong words or get tongue tied...she feels the need to comment rather rudely and make fun of. This morning it happened 3 times alone...I then quit talking to her which infuriated her. Well, two can play this game chica! I've been there, that snooty patooty, I know everything kind of girl....and now that I'm being pumped full of more hormones I'm there again...only now I'm smarter and really do know more....so look out honey cause you're not gonna win! Oh sorry maybe that was a little much...but truly raising a teenage girl can make you feel real dumb real quick...
I told her this morning that she can act cool at school and like she's smarter than me...but at home you're just a little girl and still my child....and the rudeness will not be tolerated...there I put my foot down...showed her whose boss...or well just maybe acted a little immature and just quit talking to her. Either way I'm not happy about this new Crazy Girl that has joined our family. Boo...I miss my little girl that used to love to snuggle and color with me. Now I'm just an irritating nuisance who makes her clean up after herself and do her chores...but still continues to provide a warm clean house, yummy dinner, and clean clothes. I'd hate to see how she'd treat me if I made her do these things for herself...sheeesh.
I'm truly venturing into uncharted territory. Don't get me wrong she's always been a moody girl...with a bad temper...and hasn't always been the easiest child to raise...but now she's as tall as me and probably really is smarter than me...and all of the sudden she's going to be 14 in a couple months and going to high school. And at the risk of sounding really old raising a teenager these days is so different. From cell phones, to Facebook, to anything else on the Internet and of course the same old sex and drug talks (not that we are dealing w/ any of these issues but we talk very openly about all of it)...there are so many "new" things out there. Many new things that we talk about very openly in the hopes of not allowing her curiosity to get the best of her. We talk about the "sexting" issues that now go on among teens...we've drilled it in her head about what a bad idea it is. We've talked many times about drinking and drugs...and let me tell you I have learned so many new things that kids are doing to hide it and I can't even believe some of it's true. All I know is right now I am thankful that the only issues we are having are her rude tongue and occasional moody temperament. But hearing stories of young girls being caught doing things to boys that they shouldn't even know about at this age really scares me. I am now seeing why God has blessed me with only one daughter! Of course I wouldn't want my boys doing these things either...and I openly talk to them as well. But I think girls feel a little more pressure to please and make friends and boys happy and want to fit in.
No one ever said being a parent was easy...so I'm trying to stay ahead of the game...read up on what's going on out there....get out of my little naive world...talk with other parents and teachers...and keep the Internet locks on...monitor her cell phone...and keep tabs on where all my kids are at all times without being overbearing or intrusive...and give as much love and understanding as possible. Oh boy I have my work cut out for me!
Maybe one day if all my kids make it through okay I'll write a book...about how real life is...and not all these cutsie fairy tale type famiyl stories. The Harsh Realities of Being a Parent in a New World....catchy dontcha think?